James?" Cooper please," I answered. "Marine Corp training ma'am." And all of you please call me Jenna," she replied. "The Marine Corp teaches kayaking?" Their advanced aquatic survival classes do," I answered dryly."Very well then," she said with a bright smile. "We try to pair up each of our experienced kayakers with an inexperienced one. You have four experienced kayakers and four inexperienced. Nate and I will each tandem with one of you inexperienced. Which of you four would like to volunteer to tandem with a less experienced friend?"The four of us looked at each other for a second before we all raised our hands more or less simultaneously. Ryan gave Sid a look and stepped forward."Sid and I will volunteer. We are an old, settled couple. Let the young lovers here share a kayak," he said in his eastern European accent while pointing to Kelli and I. Kelli blushed. I must have too, based on the laughs from everyone."You are presuming a little ahead of the facts I think, Ryan," Greta. The monkey mimed a drinking action.“They were drinking?”The monkey nodded his head.“What else?” continued the officer.The monkey pinched his fingers together, held them to his mouth and rolled his eyes.“They were smoking marijuana?”The monkey nodded.“Anything else?” asked the officer.The monkey mimed a kiss.“They were kissing too?”The monkey nodded his head.“So,” said the officer, “you’re saying they were drinking, smoking and kissing before they crashed the car?”The monkey nodded.“And what were you doing while all this was going on?”“Driving,” mimed the monkey.A couple were driving home late at night in the pouring rain when their car accidentally ran over a badger. They got out of the car to see whether it was still alive, and found that although it was very cold, the animal was still breathing. “What shall we do?” said the wife. “I know,” said the husband. “Put it between your legs to warm it up.” “But it’s all wet and it stinks!” “Well, cover the badger’s nose then!”A man strolls.
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